Laughter and Bereavement
There are times when humor and laughter are not appropriate, but there are times that even though it may not seem appropriate, humor and laughter are a necessity. For instance, some might say that humor and laughter are inappropriate at a funeral or when a loved one passes away. But laughter may actually help us cope with the loss.
Several years ago I attended the funeral of a close family friend. She and her husband were in show-business and they often worked, toured, and vacationed together with my parents. So when she passed away it was a sad time for all. We not only lost a friend but part of our extended family. At the funeral several family members and friends stood up to give eulogies. They talked about how sad this was and how terrible cancer is. Then Morey Amsterdam, from the old Dick Van Dyke Show, spoke. He started telling humorous stories about her and jokes. Soon those tears of sorrow became tears of laughter.
Was it inappropriate to share humor and laughter at the funeral? NO! I think Morey made us realize that day that it is more important to remember the good times, the laughter, and the humor of the deceased than to focus on death and disease.
April 5th, 2006 at 4:54 pm
[…] Obviously no one wants to succumb to the inevitable, but maintaining your humor can help ease the grief by your loved ones. In an earlier article, entitled “Laughter and Bereavement”, I talked about how the late Morey Amsterdam from the old Dick Van Dyke Show taught me about keeping a sense of humor while morning the loss of a loved one. I have had several people come up to me after speaking to their organization on “laughter as a wellness program” entitled “Take Two Laughs and Call Me In the Morning” to tell me how they coped with the loss of a loved one using humor and laughter therapy. One lady and her daughter said, “When my husband died my daughter and I sat around and shared funny stories about my husband. It really helped us cope and get over the bereavement period much sooner than my two sons who thought is was inappropriate to laugh at such a time. It took them much longer to get over the loss of their father than it took my daughter and me.” […]